Unlucky Me

For once in my life I'd like to be the girl that gets what she wants. Everything I've ever received is because of hard work and dedication, not that its a bad thing I just wish things would come easy. High school is ending soon and I'm so excited but the uncertainty of my relationship with my boyfriend of two years is putting a damper on my excitement. I love him so much but I have no idea if he'll still be here in four months. Its hard to enjoy yourself when you're so worried about the future. Its especially hard now because I'm trying to view my future and I have no idea whether he'll be in it or not. I don't want  to be the girl that can't live without a boyfriend, but he is so much more than a boyfriend to me, he's also my best friend and I don't want to lose him. To lose him so suddenly is going to kill me, I don't want to pick myself back up again. I'm so lost, I don't know what to do. This is probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to face.